For the past few months, the wife has been nagging me to buy a 2nd umbrella for the backyard patio. After looking at and rejecting many many many umbrellas/gazebos for various reasons (not big enough, green roof, flimsy feeling etc...), we gave ourselves a deadline of this Friday (tomorrow) to have one purchased and setup.

I was torn between a simple pop-up tent or a gazebo with a bug net. Ace hardware has the pop-up and Home Depot has the gazebo.

Fast forward to 2 nights ago.

A Big Lots commercial comes on and advertises a gazebo with a bug net for.... get this... $88.

$88?

Really?

****, I'm getting that one. C'mon wife, lets go!

We jump in the Passat and head into Round Lake Beach to the Big Lots.

I have to tell you, if you haven't ever been to one of these places, the best way to describe it is a controlled yard sale or off-brands. For example, in the personal hygiene isle, they had deoderant. Addidas deodorant. Not anti-persperant/deodorant, but just deodorant. Addidas? Huh? The rest of the store was filled with racks and racks of ****. Oh, I'm sorry, clothes. *rolls eyes*

Anyway.

We wander into the home furnishings isle (or big pile of **** - not quite sure how these stores are organized). We saw a 10x10 pop-up tent which I liked but the wife didn't like the green roof. We passed. Next to it was another pile of ****… err, wait. MERCHANDISE. This stack of boxes showed a picture of a 12x12 gazebo with bug netting but the price was $130. Nope. This wasn't the one advertised.

Tucked away under yet another pile of **** was the 10x12 gazebo which was advertised on TV. Yep. $88. Score! Being a very wary consumer, I looked over the package very carefully, read every last word and made the decision to buy it.

Now keep in mind, this gazebo was almost exactly the same thing as the Home Depot model but the price was 1/4 One quarter!

Last night I unpacked the box and laid all of the parts on the back patio and started to follow the directions. The directions were, well how should I say, vague and inaccurate at best? But who cares, they are directions which have been translated from one language to another and to another and finally to English. What do you expect.

There was one part of the directions which gave me a chuckle. The directions said to, "place piece A into B securing it with C. Then we stand the..."

We?

Where did we come from? The directions were written in the 3rd person and all of a sudden one sentence is in the 1st?

Ok, whatever.

Here is when the fun begins. After I have successfully made the top rectangle, the directions tell me to install the roof supports. Long sides here, short sides there and the shortest side there. Ok got it. One side down, one to go.

Long side here, short side there, shortest side…. PINK! WTF was that? SNAP! FUUUUUCK. The top support piece broke (which happens to be made from some substance that resembles corn flakes). Ok, I can fix this.

<img src="http://images10.fotki.com/v197/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5149-vi.jpg">

CRACK!

<img src="http://images9.fotki.com/v199/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5150-vi.jpg">

Another piece broke. I'm sure it must have been the leaf that gently blew on to the structure.

<img src="http://images10.fotki.com/v197/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5151-vi.jpg">

and

<img src="http://images9.fotki.com/v199/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5152-vi.jpg">

It gets better...

<img src="http://images10.fotki.com/v195/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5153-vi.jpg">

Spot welds anyone?

<img src="http://images10.fotki.com/v195/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5154-vi.jpg">

Look at the quality of the 24awg tubing.

<img src="http://images10.fotki.com/v196/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5155-vi.jpg">

Finally... Check out the carnage from this hunk of crap.

<img src="http://images9.fotki.com/v180/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5148-vi.jpg">

Needless to say, this was the worst piece of **** I have ever purchased.

Don't buy from Big Lots.

With some luck, they will take this thing back. Otherwise, does anyone want to buy $5 of scrap metal?

***UPDATE!***

Click on the link for part 2!

 

It looks like Homer Simpson assembled it! ;-)

 

Looks like the framework for an ultralight plane! Go fly it!!!

 

Heh, indeed you do. Good luck with the Home Depot purchase

 

Being a CMF never pays off.

 

I'm sorry . . . but this pic made me laugh - lots.

<img src="http://images9.fotki.com/v180/photos/2/218631/2369659/DSC_5148-vi.jpg">

 

When the whole thing collapsed, I was mad. After a beer or three, I had a chuckle.

 

In the blink of an eye...You'll see some dude trying to fit it inside his shopping cart. Off to the scrappers!

 

if that artist kicks, those triangles could be worth a fortune!

 

Sorry, but I can't stop laughing......that last picture is too much.