fka smurfette

> Chicago Driving...
>
> First you must learn to pronounce the city name. It is Chi-ca-go, or
> Cha-ca-ga depending on if you live North or South of Roosevelt Rd.
>
However, you will rarely call it Chicago. It is just "the City."
>
> Next, if your road map is more than a few weeks old, throw it out and buy
> a new one. If in Naperville and your map is one day old, then it
> is already obsolete.
>
> Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Chicago has its own
> version of traffic rules... "Hold on and pray."
>
> There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Chicago. We all
> drive like that.
>
> All directions start with, "I94"... which has no beginning
> and no end.
>
If added up, the hourly rate to park downtown is likely far more than your
monthly car payment.

> The morning rush hour is from 6 to 10. The evening rush hour is from 3
> to 7. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.
>
> You must be aggressive with CTA buses (if you don't know what a CTA bus is
> then when you do see one stay out of its way - this is for experienced
> Chicago drivers only.) - remember if they hit you, get a lawyer and wait
> for the big fat check from the city.
>
> Warning - Cab drivers have no fear and do not care about their cars. If
> you do get in an accident with a cabbie, be warned.
English is their NEXT language.
>
> If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed
> out and possibly shot. When you are the first one on the starting line,
> look quickly when the light turns green before going to avoid crashing
> with all the drivers running the red light in cross-traffic- if no one is
> running the red light then hit the gas!
>
> Everyone has places to be! Get to your destination quickly - why waste
> time in your car?
>
When in the City, do not get into any lane with a horse or a bus.
>
> Construction on Northwest Toll way is a way of life and a permanent form
> of entertainment. We had sooooo much fun with that we have added Elgin
> O'Hare and I-355 to the mix.
>
> If toll both gates are up, throw the money as you go through at 5 mph -
> there is absolutely no need to stop and wait for the green thank you
> light! Always have the money ready! Looking for money on the floor of
> your car and holding up traffic causes horns and hand gestures from the
> people who's time you are now wasting. All Chicago drivers will avoid
> other cars at toll booths with out of state plates.
>
> All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase, "Oh, we're in Cicero!"
>
>
> Car horns are actually "Road Rage" indicators.
>
> All old ladies with blue hair in Mercedes have the right of way. Period.
>
> First Ave, LaGrange Rd, NW Highway, all mysteriously change
> names as you cross intersections (these are only a FEW examples).
>
> If asking directions in Cicero you must have knowledge of
> Spanish. If in Bridgeport, Mandarin Chinese
> will be your best bet. If you stop to ask directions on the West
> or South side you better be armed.
>
> A trip across town (east to west) will take a minimum of four hours,
> although many north/south freeways have unposted minimum speeds of 75.
>
> The minimum acceptable speed on the Dan Ryan is 85.
> Anything less is considered downright sissy.
>
> The wrought iron on windows near Englewood and Austin is not
> ornamental.
>
> The Congress expressway is our daily version of NASCAR.
>
> The Dan Ryan is called "The Death Trap" for two reasons: "death" and
> "trap."
>
> If it's 100 degrees, It's taste of Chicago. If it's 10
> degrees and sleeting/snowing, It's opening day at Sox Park. If
> it's rained 6 inches in the last hour, the Western open Golf Classic is
> in the second round
>
> If you go to the Wrigley Field pay the $25.00 to park "Cubs Lot". Parking
> elsewhere could cost up to $2500 for damages, towing fees, tickets, etc.
> If some guy with a flag tries to get you to park in his
> 'yard', run over him.
>

SameerP

guy came over and said "thanks for breaking that $500 gate."

Found a 4 foot piece of the gate lodged in my roof rack.

Damn i miss that old truck.