JustAdam

Dear Santa Letters

A Christmas keeper....love that santa!
>
>
>deer santa:
>
>I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a
>gud boy all yeer. Yer Frend, BiLLy
>
>Dear Billy,
>
>Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn
>care. How about I send you a frigging book so you can
>learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother
>the space ranger. At least HE can spell! Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _________
>
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I
>ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!
>Love, Sarah
>
>Dear Sarah,
>
>Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't
>they?
>
>Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _________
>
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas,
>I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together.
>Please see what you can do. Love, Teddy
>Dear Teddy,
>
>Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen
>door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that
>up to come back to your frigid, fat mom, who rides his
>*** constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let
>me get you some nice Legos instead. Maybe you can
>build yourself a family with those? Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _______
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I.
>Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba. Love,
>Francis
>
>Dear Francis,
>
>Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're
>gay.
>
>Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _______
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I
>left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.
>Love, Susan
>
>Dear Susan,
>
>Milk gives me the ****s and carrots make the deer fart
>in my face when ridin g in the sleigh. You want to do
>me a favor? Two words, Jim Beam. Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _______
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you
>busy making toys? Your friend, Thomas
>
>Dear Thomas,
>
>All the toys are made by little kids like you in
>China. Every year I give them a slice of bread as a
>Christmas bonus. I have a condo in Vegas, where I
>spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I
>unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the
>asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the
>craps table. Santa P.S. Tell your mom she got the
>part. "Long Dong" Claus
>
>______________________________________________ _______
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know
>when we're awake, like in the song? Love, Jessica
>
>Dear Jessica,
>
>Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever
>you do. I'm skipping your house. Santa
>
>______________________________________________ ______
>
>Dear Santa,
>
>I really really want a puppy this year. Please please
>please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one? Timmy
>
>Timmy,
>
>That whiney begging **** may work with your folks, but
>that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting an ugly
>sweater again. Santa
>
>______________________________________________ _______
>
>Dearest Santa,
>
>We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get
>into our home? Love, Marky
>
>Mark,
>
>First, stop calling yourself "Marky", that's why
>you're getting your *** kicked at school. Second, you
>don't live in a house, you live in a low-rent, ghetto apartment
>complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like all the burglars do,
>through your bedroom window. Sweet Dreams, Santa

XCLR8TT

<center><img src="http://dennisjudd.com/albums/funpics/repost.jpg"></center><p>

GeTT da NeTT

Repost, but still funny. Thanks for the complement on the sig. There is a story that goes with it.

JustAdam

I am guessing that you are trying to state this is a re-post?

Oh well!

JustAdam

Or the story that went along with the post - lol

about a year ago maybe?

XCLR8TT

Dang.. and it was a real good one too.

GeTT da NeTT

<ul><li><a href="https://forums.audiworld.com/tt/msgs/1249734.phtml">This was it</a></li></ul>