Hokie_Audi

So I'm down in Savannah this weekend. My buddy and his wife are in the market for a new car for her, so we go around test driving all afternoon. First we hit the Volvo dealership to check out the S60. We drove the stripper model with the NA 2.4. The car is quite nice, and the leather seats and door inserts are magnificient, but the interior lacks inspiration, at least in the base S60. Also the performance was tepid, particularly with the automatic (mandated by the wife). But it's a nice solid car. The sales staff were also very relaxed and professional.

After that it's on to the local Nissan dealership. We drive on the lot and I park along side all the new Altimas that are on display (my Hibiscus Red A4 is instantly the best looking car on the lot).

We go in and plop down inside the show model 3.5 Altima. The interior is definitely downmarket. The switchgear is noticeably cheaper than in the Volvo, there's loads of bad plastic, and the entire interior is just wrong. The three pod instrument cluster is irritating, the dash is plain funky and the plastic inserts look really chintzy. The Altima is all motor, nothing else on that car is worth the price of admission.

We take one out for a spin and the drivetrain is very nice, plenty of pickup and the transmission shifts very smoothly, the ride is pretty quiet, though nowhere near as good as my A4. I'm basically along to be the "bad cop" when we're talking to salesman so I start asking the guy questions. I ask him about the torque specs on the 3.5. Our salesman responds, "Oh I think it's around 280 ft-lbs." Buzz! It's 246 ft-lbs. He also told us that the 3.5 didn't have automatic climate control. Buzz! It's part of the Leather package. But other than that the sales guy wasn't bad... he just didn't know his stuff, though in his defense he was the "test drive" guy and was relatively new.

So we make our last stop at the Honda dealership and take out one of the V6-EX Accords. Here's where it get's good. My buddy and I have owned three Accords between us, so we're very knowledgeable about their cars... so we start talking with the salesguy as we're driving around. I tell him about the two Accords that I've had, both of which were excellent cars, and that the only thing that kept me out of another Accord was a lack of a manual transmission on the V6.

First boneheaded salesguy statement: "You can't put a manual transmission on this engine without destroying the drivetrain. They can't make a torque converter strong enough to handle it."

To which I respond, "Well Audi doesn't seem to have a problem with that." Nevermind that a) manual transmissions don't have torque converters and b) this guy has no idea about cars in general.

The salesguy says, "You've got an Audi? Which model?"

I tell him I've got an A4.

Second boneheaded salesguy statement: "Have you checked that car for recalls?"

Me: "Uh... It's A-Okay. There was a control arm issue back in the 90's but that's about it. The car is fantastic."

Salesguy: "Well there's a newer problem, with the rear suspension. A lot of them have been flipping over."

Me: "That's the TT. There was a problem about three years ago with TT's on the Autobahns losing control at speeds over 120 because of a lack of rear downforce, the fixed it with a small spoiler. Though you'd never see those kinds of speeds in the U.S."

Salesguy: ----

So we head back to the dealership and he pops the hood and gives us the tour of the engine bay. He points out the VTEC system. I ask him if performance lobe cutoff is still skyhigh. (At this point I know he's clueless, I'm just being cruel for my buddy's benefit.)

Salesguy's third boneheaded statement: Actually VTEC works over the entire range of power. It's always switching from one lobe to the other. It's really designed to help at lower engine speeds."

That's pretty much a trifecta of incorrect information, every statement he made was completely wrong. He definitely knows nothing about the products he's selling. We get his card and return to my A4, with me barely being able to control my laughter.

There were additional entertaining moments but those are the highlights. For those that are curious about the 3.5 Altima I offer some of my observations gleamed from the test drive:

1. The motor and drivetrain are really nice. It's obvious that you're getting a nice motor that happens to have a car tacked onto it.

2. Quality wise I think the Altima is a step down from their previous two generations. The interior build quality is really sketchy now. Again all the money goes for the motor. It's bigger and faster than the Maxima (at least until the 02's roll out) but it's nowhere near as nice.

3. The dash design is simply gawdawful. The ergonomics are trash. You gotta sit in one to see what I mean. The fake wood is *really* fake looking. I've seen better stuff in Hyundai's. (And no... that's not a sarcastic remark. Hyundai wood looks better).

4. ABS is part of an $800 option package. You've got to be ****ting me. You'll be paying extra for all six airbags as well.

5. The shifter maze for the automatic is more infuriating than the J-Gate on a Jag. Again you gotta try and use it to understand. Remember what I said about the ergonomics...

6. I'm no fan of the big *** on the new A4, but the *** on the Altima is gigantic. The trunk falls to the bumper in basically one plane... it is enourmous. It's like they expended all of their creative energies on the front and by the time they got to the back they just slapped ricer reflective taillights on it and called it a day.

7. The engine is fantastic and smooth and powerful, but those are the only superlatives this car will garner. Everything else is a tack-on. This car is lightyears away from being anything close to the Audi in terms of interior quality, fit, and finish. I'm sure it's plenty faster than my car but I don't care.

Cheer's all!

BoBSageT

so what did your friend end up going with?

Hokie_Audi

That one's got a low pressure turbo, a better interior, and much better power, around 198 horsepower with a nice smooth torque curve similar to the A4.

The Altima was definitely the most fun to drive (in terms of stomp, rev, and go) but that's about it. The suspension is nothing to get excited over. It'd be cool if you had one to tear around in but to have one for awhile would be pretty tough... the interior got old in about thirty seconds.

Kinetic0510

LoL!!! I loved the sales man's sales pitch about Vtec. Proof they are just salesmen, & nothing more

AFourSheezy

haha...idiots

kyan

Does he like Saab?

Mirror|rorriM

First he tried convincing me that the car was capable of doing things it wasn't, then that a TT has the same Quattro that an S6 does. Then he tried to convince me that I had never really driven an Audi, or at the very least driven one hard. So I flashed my keys and then pointed to the "WPI Motorsports" shirt I was wearing. At that point he simply WALKED AWAY.

Ummm....hello? What the UCKFAY was he thinking? That maybe I had forgotten he was there? My attention span is short, but not -that- short.

GPO - Needs a car!

Of course most are little children magazine racers with no actual knowledge. When that Altima was first spoken of, people here were considering selling their Audis for it! :O

Mirror|rorriM

Have you seen the 35th anniversary SS?

Hokie_Audi

The engine is beefy, very responsive, and very powerful. But that's it. The interior is trash, literally third rate compared to older Altimas. If people jump from an A4 to an Altima because they pop wood at the output numbers then I don't really know why they were in the A4 to begin with. They're worlds different. Just like the WRX and the passing fad there, sure it's a turbo AWD car, but that's all they have in common.